What a blessing it has been to share my heart with as many that was able to read part 1 of this article. I have received positive feed back and I am hoping that this concluding part will also help as many.
To reiterate on the first part, it is important to know that talking helps the healing process, when you talk there might be tears, regrets, doubts, fear of the future alone, etc being able to talk about your fears etc helps to put your life in perspective and if you are able to have understanding people around you like I did then you are on your way to healing, if you don't have close family members, like I said there are bodies in place to help you and searching your counseling directory (in your country) for such help lines should be the first thing you do instead of locking up yourself and crying or thinking about it, because if you don't talk about it, the situation seems bigger than it is. Forgiving and letting go will create enough room in your mind and heart to thoroughly evaluate your life. Evaluation of your self, knowing what you would like to do with your life now that you are single again is an important part of healing, it does not matter whether you have a degree or not,or whether you have never worked before, there is always something you can do with your life you just have to have a positive attitude and finally speaking out what you believe about what you would like to do and believing that you can do it is important.
The Now For Me: I re-evaluated my life and decided to go into business for myself, now to be honest with you, this didn't work out for me as I realized that I was coming from a background of absolutely nothing into trying to start a business myself, so dear friends I ended up in more debt, but before I went deeper into debt., I stopped the business and went back into the job market. The first job I could lay my hands on was in a supermarket, so with my masters degree, I started working at the first thing that came my way because I knew I did not want to remain on the dole and wallow in anymore self pity. It was while I was working at the retail store, I decided to try for X-Factor 2007 and it was a wonderful experience. I went for the auditions and got through to boot camp, however I did not make it to the finals, to my disappointment. The thing is I went into the talent show because I knew I could sing and nothing would happen unless I made it happen, so off I went, understand that I was doing things that were within my reach to improve upon myself, to boost my morale etc. I had my 15mins of fame I met Simon Cowell, Danni Minogue, Sharon Osbourne and Louis Walsh. Now if I was sitting and moping around would I have been in the same room as these great people, NO!!! While I am not asking you to do anything drastic, I am advising that instead of thinking you are not good enough for anything, as it is generally the way one would feel after a divorce or separation, look around you and do whatever your hand finds to do.
Never ever feel that you are not good enough, because that is generally what the other party wants you to feel. Remember you are created in God's image, that is a powerful thing to know and understand, you are fearfully and wonderfully made, He made only one of you, so you are one of a kind and never feel that you are not good enough, because you kind of rubbish the thought God put into creating you.
So while I am writing this, my ex is still keeping more in contact with his kids and getting to find out about their likes and dislikes, trying to make an effort in his own way to help. Remember at one point I was feeling distraught licking my wounds, trying to make him do right by his kids, but the moment I decided to take care of myself and repair me, I put the thought of him and what he should be doing behind me, I started looking after my kids by myself and with God's help, I went from one good job to another, I currently work with an international insurance company and I am enjoying my job.
Dear friends, my kids are doing well in school, we are all doing much better than we were a few years ago (except for the loans from my failed business, which I know will somehow be cleared off, my thinking is now unlimited, I believe anything can happen, I believe, I believe, I believe), I now have more confidence in myself, in fact I am so not afraid to speak my mind, I am not afraid to fall because I am not afraid to rise up and walk no matter how many times I fall.
If You Fail Try Again: Dear friends, the idea is to try and do something with your life, anything as long as it is legal, there may be failure down the road, but how will you know for sure unless you try. So do not let your divorce or separation bring you down, dust yourself up and start doing something with your life, if you fail, hey as long as you are breathing try again and again until something works, because eventually failure will see you and run because it knows you will just bounce back again!
Finally make sure you never make the same mistake you did the first time as re-evaluation, means taking stock of your whole life and knowing that you will try to right whatever wrongs in your life so you are going into a new life, a new relationship as a completely healed and focused person who now knows what he or she wants from life.
Thanks for letting me share my thoughts with you, till we meet again, Remain Favored.
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